How to be a good client

Ever have one of those days when you wished you could fire a client?

Many years ago, when I was working retail at a one hour photo lab (I'm really dating myself now, aren't I?), I had my first instance of wanting to kick a customer where it counts. I can't remember what the issue was, but suffice to say I was close to tears by the time he had finished loudly berating me in front of everyone else in the store, coworkers and other customers alike. My manager calmly walked up to the counter and said, "We won't charge you for your order. Now please leave and don't come back again. I won't have you speaking to my staff like that."

I was in awe. "Can my manager really do that?" I wondered to myself. He did. And the business thrived under his management. He cared about his staff and it showed in our performance.

Sorry, tangent. My point is, do you want to be that client? Because a good business person, whether a retail manager, a freelance creative, or an agency president will fire a bad client if they need to. Yes, the economy stinks. But a good business person knows that their sanity and that of their staff (and perhaps their family, in the case of the freelancer) isn't worth it.

Isn't being tough a good thing?
While you may think being difficult is the best way to get what you want, often it stalls and outright derails projects. I'm not talking about being a strong, colourful character who brings ideas to the table. I'm talking about the know-it-alls, the argumentative, the time wasters, and the "Let's yell at the administrator because I'm having a shitty day," kind of client.

In short, good clients enable the experts they have contracted to get things done. Here's how you can be a good client.

1. Commit your time to the project.
You would think that if an individual or a company is ready to pay a professional the big bucks, they would be equally willing to commit their time. Yes, delegating time to your staff is fine, that's what they get paid for, right? But in the end, if you're the business owner, it's your baby. You need to be there for the important meetings. You need to look at every item you approve. Otherwise, you run the risk of discovering something is missing, or worse yet, wrong, when it's too late.

2. Be prepared for our first meeting.
You know your business best. I need to know what your pains are, what your objectives are, and what your clients want. This way, we can all work together to eliminate those nasty pains, and see where your objectives and your client's objectives overlap. That gives us an excellent starting point. Being unprepared simply wastes time. And the adage that time is money is true for both of us.

3. Answer my questions.
I swear, I am not calling you or emailing you questions after our meeting to make your life difficult or because I'm exceedingly lonely. I want to get the job done, and get it done right. And if I keep asking you the same question in different ways? It's because you didn't answer it when I first asked it! When you refuse to answer my questions because you're busy, or because you assume I should know the answer already, it does nothing to move the project forward. And it puts me in a negative frame of mind. Remember, you're paying me to do a job!

4. Remember that sometimes, mistakes happen.
As much as I wish it wasn't the case, shit happens sometimes. I'm a perfectionist when it comes to my work, so believe me when I say it probably hurts me more than it hurts you when I make a mistake. Yes, I'll take my lumps, but there's no need to berate me, much less take it out on someone who isn't to blame, like the office manager, or my colleague if I'm away on the particular day you call. Let me know you're disappointed, but let me know how I can fix the problem and I guarantee you, I will go above and beyond to make you happy. You may even forget about the mistake that made you so angry to begin with.

5. Admit when you are wrong.
Yeah, I know, this is hard for many of us in our personal lives, much less our professional lives. A creative friend actually inspired today's post with a Facebook status about a client, a real estate agent who wanted an open house ad, and forgot to give the team an address. Kind of critical to having an open house, no? Anyway, instead of apologizing when called by the agency, the client screamed, yelled, bitched, moaned, and, get this, said the address wasn't necessary. Yes, you read that correctly. Admit you're wrong and move on.

Creatives and clients alike: any suggestions on other qualities that make for a good client?

Hello contentpalooza

Alright, I haven't written in a while. Well, rather, I haven't blogged. Yeah, yeah, don't write about not blogging and maybe people won't notice.

Anyway, I've been trying to get back into it. But starting a new job in August, the insanity that comes with having a pre-schooler and my partner in crime's fall schedule doing school photography has meant blogging has been firmly placed on the back burner.

I'm just not one of those people who can wake up at 3am, work out, write, then serve a nutritious hot breakfast to my family. Leisurely walk to daycare while encouraging my son to stop at every leaf, flower and tree. Drop him off and get to work with half an hour to spare, enjoy coffee and the paper as my colleagues trickle in.

I'm more like press snooze, wake up in a panic realizing I actually turned off the alarm, say goodbye to the husband who is on his way out the door, inspire my child to wake up and get ready by barking orders like a drill sergeant, trying to make the kid pick one of two healthy cereals rather than the weekend sugar bombs, then dashing for the bus, doing daycare drop-off and heading for work. Work my ass off and try not to panic at looming deadlines. Come home, drop dead. Wake up next day and repeat.

Sorry, I got sidetracked there.

Then I saw it: #contentpalooza in a tweet from @violetzombie.

contentpalooza
It's about content (duh). It's an offshoot of NaNoWriMo, aka National Novel Writing Month, when writers write a novel in one month. I've seen a 50,000 word count mentioned here and there. Anyway, contentpalooza seems to mean different thing to different writers. But the key is producing content for 30 days. In a row, not over a year.

Someone I'll no doubt draw inspiration from is my friend, artiste Bret Taylor, who is has been painting every day for just under 700 days. He had his first solo art show last month, which is a huge deal, right? And who has an art show because they paint every now and then?

Any successful writer will tell you to write every day (Stephen King does just that in On Writing). And any successful creator will tell you to create every day.

No concrete goals, just write
So I'll be honest. Right now, I don't have a goal in mind other than blogging every day. I'm hoping that by doing this, I'll get some ideas for projects I can work on. I'm happy that I make a living writing and I'm certainly not going to bite the hand that feeds. However, I always promised myself that whether I was writing full-time for money or not, I would always work on my own creative projects.

Maybe by putting some ideas down in writing here, it will give me the motivation I need to start exploring some of them.

My ideas
1. Write more about my grandparents' farm. I've toyed with using those memories as inspiration for creative non-fiction but I've been a chicken about it.
2. Write more about the causes I support. Yeah, I know, I don't want to become a one-issue writer. But I'm finding my passion for local issues is becoming stronger. Maybe I need to do something about it.
3. Interview and write about my friends who seem to have become content creation machines. Pro: it will give me a kick in the ass. Con: it may be the easy way out, since it would be easy to take the lazy way out and let them tell the story.
4. Hash out creative issues I'm having in my 9-5 job and see if I can resolve them myself or perhaps solicit advice from readers.
5. Explore the unexplored? Not really sure what I mean by that...

I'm not going to put a word count on this because I'm really starting from nothing. Well, nothing since July. Anyway, I think I'm done for tonight. See you all again tomorrow.

Weekend to End Women's Cancers Fundraiser

Hi everyone. I'm stoked and extremely grateful to announce that Wendy D Photography and Juggernauts team captain Chrissy Watson are hosting a fundraiser for the Weekend to End Women's Cancers. Yep, that's my team (well, Chrissy's team, really) and it promises to be a great time.

For a minimum donation of $20 come and get a fun, fabulous photo by Wendy D. Find out more at the Get Your Pink on! Facebook page.

If you can't make it but want to give to the cause, visit http://www.endcancer.ca/goto/lori_writes or click on the fancy pink badge below.

Walking for Sue

Okay, so it's getting to crunch time with the Weekend to End Women's Cancers. I'm just over half-way to raising the minimum $2,000 and the cut-off for mailing in cheque donations is July 22. (Online donations made by day one of the walk [August 13] will count towards my minimum.)

When I started out, I shared some stories about the people I'm walking for - my cousin Pam who shared her story on my blog, and Joyce, a family friend who passed away last winter.

There is one story I have been hesitant to share. My mother-in-law, Sue, died six months before my husband and I got married. That's her with my husband, he's the wee guy in front, my sister-in-law Connie on the right and cousin John on the left. John's wife, Chrissy, is the captain of the Juggernauts, the team I'm doing the walk with.

Sue had lung cancer, which technically isn't one of the women's cancers I'm walking for. However, lung cancer accounts for more than 1/4 of cancer deaths every year. There was a point when I recall studies indicated that lung cancer rates were climbing for women, though according to the Canadian Cancer Society, those rates are now leveling off.

My point is, whatever the type of cancer she had, the sense of loss I felt when she died was beyond anything I could have imagined. She is the most significant woman in my life who I have lost to cancer.

We didn't know each other for that long. We had only met each other a handful of times before George and I got engaged one spring. I do clearly remember him calling his parents that night. I also remember her excitedly shouting, "Connie, you have a sister!" when I was on the phone with her.

From Tom Jones to Loss, Sadness & Anger
I remember staying up late with her, George and Joyce (who I've mentioned) drinking way too much wine. Sue and I bonded over our mutual fondness of Tom Jones and George Carlin. I remember her laughing at my hungover state the next day. It wasn't long after this that she was diagnosed with lung cancer.

She stayed positive for much of her treatment, which included removing a good chunk of one lung (may have been the entire lung, my husband and I can't remember which it was), chemo and radiation. She cut out a picture from a magazine of the dress she wanted to get for her son's and my destination wedding booked the following spring. And she talked about how much she wanted to see the Mayan Ruins on our trip. Before Christmas that year, she died. December 6, 1997.

I won't go into details. I think most of us have lost someone close to us to cancer. In the end, it looks the same. And in the end, that sense of loss, sadness and anger is similar for many of us, though the reasons behind those emotions may vary. I selfishly felt ripped off. Here was this amazing person who became a part of my life and poof, gone. I was devastated watching my significant other, my father-in-law and sister-in-law work through grief in their own ways.

The Ways I Miss Her
I still miss her in many ways. I miss Sue when:

1) Our son asks about "my other Grandma."

2) Our son does something quirky and I can't ask her whether her kids did the same thing. (Let's face it, moms have a memory bank like no other.).

3) I look at a picture of her and my husband.

4) I look at a picture of her and my father-in-law, her usually laughing and him usually looking mischievous.

5) I hear someone refer to having one too many as being in their cups.

6) I hear Tom Jones' Delilah.

7) I go through my jewelry and see one of her rings.

8) Mother's Day.

9) My husband tells a funny childhood story - I want to hear her version of it!

10) I see the colour peach (it was the colour of the dress she wanted to wear at our wedding - must have been a favourite, judging by the above photo of her with George, who gets a huge thanks for allowing me to share his family photos).

So my point of all this is, regardless of the type of cancer she died of, I miss my mother-in-law. A lot. And if by taking part in the Weekend to End Women's Cancers I help prevent someone else from feeling that mixture of loss, sadness and anger, I'll feel like I accomplished something truly significant.

If you wish to donate, simply click on the pink badge at the top of this story or click here. If you prefer to mail a cheque, there's a form you need to print out on the website which ensures your donation goes towards my fundraising efforts. Or you can do it online with a credit card. If you're feeling particularly brave, you could also join our team. Let 'em know I sent you when you fill out your info online and that will raise another $100 on my behalf!

Thanks again and much love to all who have donated. It really means a lot to me.

Why Words Matter - The Vancouver Riot Aftermath

Words matter.

I think most Vancouver Canucks fans who weren't downtown cringed when they heard and saw the first reports of the riots. Supposed fans in team jerseys - if they weren't burning them, that is - setting fire to police cars, fighting, throwing bricks and bottles at police and eventually trashing our city core, looting businesses.

Eventually, they turned on reporters they were at first so eager to show off for, realizing the news cameras were capturing evidence. (Never mind the fact that they used their own phones to take pictures they proudly posted on Facebook later. Talk about evidence).

Then came the comments on various social media, implying that if this was the way Canucks fans reacted, the team didn't deserve to win. That these "fans" proved Vancouver had no class and that we all, Vancouverites and our city as a whole, were crap.

The fans hit back. They argued that no, these rioters weren't true fans. They were rent-a-rioters, the same people who show up at any large public event or any protest, bent on creating violence and mayhem. The critics dug in. They said it was semantics. Wearing the Canucks logo? You're a fan, regardless of your motivation to head downtown yesterday, regardless of whether or not you packed your handy scarf to hide your face and molotov cocktails.

And yes, I was offended.

I complain about this city a lot. I complain about the cost of living, the dearth of affordable childcare, the growth of the gap between the rich and poor. Yet, I love it. I don't think I realized how much I love Vancouver until I kept waking up early this morning, shaken by the images I had seen on TV last night.

I didn't watch hockey until I moved here 12 years ago. I'm not the hardest of hardcore fans, I'm pretty middle-of-the-road. Many of my friends are Canucks fans. Not a single one was rioting last night.

Chief Constable Jim Chu noted in his statement this morning: "...our city was still vulnerable to a number of young men and women disguised as Canuck fans who were actually criminals and anarchists (emphasis mine).

These were people who came equipped with masks, goggles, gasoline and even fire extinguishers that they would use as weapons.

We recognized some of the same criminals among them who took part in the vandalism during the Olympics.

This criminal element within the crowd was responsible for the burning of 15 cars, including two police cars."

Some say the arrested include folks from Seattle and Portland, the same ones who let loose in Toronto during the G20. And there was certainly the bridge and tunnel contingent, the same drunken losers who like coming to the West End to beat up anyone they perceive to be gay and cause fights during the yearly Celebration of Light fireworks displays.

Not fans, in other words.

No, the fans were out early this morning, cleaning the city up. Putting it back together.

Meanwhile, the real fans would like an apology from the critics. Eat your words.

*You will notice I haven't posted any riot photos. I was at home so I didn't take any. I think we've seen enough of them anyway. Instead, I posted shots of people who helped clean up our city.

Freelance, I've Missed You

Let me get this straight right off. There are plenty of things that are great about my job in particular and about having a regular, 9-5 gig in general. But freelance reporting? Man, I've missed you.

When I first started freelancing many moons ago, it was tough. All that work to be told "no thanks" many times over seemed masochistic but I persisted.

And then I got it. I figured out how to turn writing about things I liked doing into assignments - at the time, I was spending a lot of spare time in a dragon boat so I started pitching articles about it. I rewrote and sold the same story 3 or 4 times. And I was hooked. Yeah, there was still rejection involved and the work of constantly networking, researching, pitching. But I had figured out how to rock it.

I balanced freelance with a part-time job for several years. Before having my son, I assumed I would file stories as my angelic baby would peacefully nap, play or contemplate life. Yeah, right.

Reality Bites
Reality hit a couple months into my maternity leave. I would still need daycare if I actually wanted to get work done, at home or otherwise. And without full-time work? It would be impossible to afford. Oh, and the PPD that turned me from a sometimes-neurotic artiste into a sobbing mess? Yeah, staying at home was not going to be my cup of tea if I wanted to save a sliver of sanity and actually be a half-decent parent.

So I found full-time work as a writer. I'm now at a different job, but still plugging away at a career as a writer in communications and marketing. But you know what? I still miss freelance reporting because:

1) It gives me the freedom to write about something I enjoy and/or feel passionate about.
2) I work with editors I like.
3) I get to meet and learn more about cool people.

A Little Inspiration
During a yoga class a few months ago, the teacher who was leading it struck a nerve with me - and I mean in a good way. Something he said made me think, "He has a story to tell. And I will not stop until it's told." I did a few more of his classes and kept thinking the same thing. I contacted my editor at Xtra West, who I had kept in touch with, and she agreed.

You can see the result, my interview with the fabulous yogi and singer Will Blunderfield at on the Xtra West website, with photos by my deliriously-talented husband, George Smeltzer. Enjoy!

A Poem for Pam

The internet can be a beautiful thing. Shortly after I posted my cousin Pam's breast cancer story, her niece Emily (my second cousin? first cousin once removed?) contacted me on Facebook. We have never met in person but chatted online about Pam.

Emily shared this poem with me that she wrote in honor of Pam. I wanted to share it with you. Thank you, Emily, for letting me post this.

Unity

Pink is the ribbon pinned to your sweater, filling your fears with peace as you gently touch it’s smooth and silky material - for you know it’s meaning.
It’s the colour you favored as a young girl, silently dreaming of princesses, wishing you would someday fill their perfectly polished heels.
It’s the colour of these walls that slowly box you in,
It’s your favourite bear whose soft body comforts you when the pain kicks in, who sleeps on the bedside table, silently watching over you like an angel.
It’s your favourite shade of lipstick, the colour of your socks hidden by the long paper gown that loudly crinkles with every breath you take.
Pink are the roses, lifeless like you, so dull yet vibrant, sad yet full of hope -
Pink is your outlet - soft, sweet, and melodic.
Pink is the colour of change, you discover, looking in the cracked mirror as you’re taught how to wear a headscarf, weeping in your husbands arms at the amount of change everything has brought.
Pink has become who you are and what you stand for -
through surgeries and treatments, through salty tears and restless nights, and through the robbery of who you once were;
pink is the colour of unity between women worldwide
race, religion, politics - they are all discarded
for we are all one in pink, the symbol of life.